Childhood is a time where fears come and go and the majority of fears may be imaginary, such as monsters under the bed. But what do we do when the fears are real and possible? With our 24 hour news sources and breaking news available immediately on our phones it can be difficult to keep our kids away from hearing about the latest tragedies that occur too frequently in our world. As a result, kids today are more afraid of a intruder on campus, a drive by shooting, or kidnapping than a monster under the bed. As adults we fear the same things as it doesn’t appear any place is truly safe.
So what then shall we do?
- Listen to their fears. Let your child talk about what is really bothering them. Try to normalize fear and that it is ok to feel this way.
- Talk about what would happen if the fear came true. Is there a plan for where to meet if there is a fire? Is there a plan at school if there is an intruder who comes on campus?
- Reassure your child that there are still heroes that fight the bad guys (firefighters, police officers, military personnel, teachers)
- Come up with plans together. Let you child be involved in the problem solving of what will help them feel safe in a world that too often doesn’t feel safe.
- Explain in age appropriate language the reasons you are setting certain boundaries and teach them the importance of staying within those boundaries.
So when fear is plaguing your child remember that fear is normal. We all get scared or worried about things but we don’t have to stay afraid. Instead, talk about those fears, come up with action plans and always look for the heroes. Who knows, you and your child just might be the heroes we need in this world.